


Cavalier Youth

by Ruin-Dun-Burnit (Ruin_Takada)



Category: Death Note
Genre: Bickering, Humour, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Stalking, Implied/Referenced Torture, Jealousy, M/M, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Post-Yotsuba Arc, Psychological Torture, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-04
Updated: 2017-11-04
Packaged: 2019-01-29 10:33:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12629106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruin_Takada/pseuds/Ruin-Dun-Burnit
Summary: The case has hit a dead end. Unable to begin killing as Kira again, Light is not so sure he wants to - not now he knows his success as Kira hinges on keeping L alive. Now that the Task Force has possession of the Yotsuba Kira's notebook, and the rules inside it have absolved Light and Misa of guilt, all that remains is for L to prove that the notebook works.





	Cavalier Youth

The case had hit a dead end.

The Kira known as Kyosuke Higuchi had been dead for over two days. His notebook had been in their possession for exactly that long. With nothing else to do, the task force was still filling out paperwork at midday when Soichiro Yagami clasped his son’s shoulder. “I know we’re not quite done here,” he said, “but have you thought about going back to To-Oh University?”

L had been working through the glass dessert bowl of gummi bears set in front of him. Footage from Higuchi’s momentary arrest played on mute on his computer. Reviewing the tapes was his newest obsession, but he turned at the sound of the chief’s voice. Light rubbed his left wrist reflexively. “What do you mean, _‘not quite done’_?” he asked, gesturing to the paperwork over on the coffee table. “We’re far from done. Kira’s still out there. All we have is his notebook and his mess to clean up.”

“The notebook is almost irrelevant unless it lives up to its reputation,” L drawled.

Matsuda and Aizawa looked up from the sofas. “Come on, Ryuuzaki,” Matsuda groaned, “not this again!”

“I agree,” Aizawa said. “There’s no point to debating this crap again. If we don’t test it, we never find out if it’s the murder weapon, we’re not doing our jobs as investigators and the notebook is just a notebook. If we test it as Ryuuzaki suggests and a criminal dies, we’re no better than Kira, and if no one dies, then Kira gets the best of us. We stand to lose either way, so unless someone finds a loophole to work out if _Schrodinger’s Notebook_ is the murder weapon, let’s drop it and get back to work.”

Both L and the chief glared at him, and yet Aizawa stood his ground. Surviving the arrest and re-joining the task force had made him brazen. Seeing a shinigami may have made him at least a little bit mad. It did, however, save them about ten minutes of an argument they’d already had.

“As I was saying,” Soichiro said to Light, “as long as you have your freedom and we don’t have a solution concerning the notebook, there’s nothing wrong with you re-enrolling and helping out at headquarters part time. Watari and Ryuuzaki both agree there’s no risk to the investigation if you do.”

“Well, as long as Ryuuzaki thinks so,” Light said. Of course, the detective wouldn’t allow a risk no matter where he was, but it didn’t stop the bristle of irritation he felt that his father brought it up. Ever since he’d regained his memories during the arrest, it had taken a little time for his mind to recover and reintegrate. As much as he knew he was Kira now, even gloated inwardly at the brilliance of his gambit, months of constant prodding and taunting had given him a _bit_ of a complex for proving his innocence. He still saw doubts in all their eyes and he couldn’t blame them; he was only under suspicion to begin with because L knew Kira was utilizing a leak to the NPA’s investigation. As much as he knew his father would expect him to be defensive since he’d seen the constant accusations first hand, he didn’t like how it made him feel – like a child rebuked.

“No one will doubt your innocence if you take up your studies again,” L chimed in. “You’ll need a degree if you intend to be a detective for the NPA.”

“At least I only missed one semester,” Light said. He could only guess at what they’d said to excuse his absence.

“You could stay at headquarters,” his father pressed, “if it helps you balance your school work and the case.”

Light nodded and looked over to L. He was back to watching the arrest footage, the screen displaying the cockpit of the helicopter. Only Light’s face remained unblurred in the film. “Sure,” Light said, “but only if Ryuuzaki can spare an afternoon for another tennis match. Right?”

“Mm.” The detective wasn’t paying attention, apparently.

“ _Another_ tennis match?”

“Yeah, Dad. It was just a friendly game on campus in April and—” he paused, remembering what had also happened that day.

“Yagami-san was very stressed,” L said. “I did mention it to him, but then, he was on strict bedrest before the--”

“You said yourself,” Light said. The last thing he needed was to be reminded of his responsibility for his father’s health. “College can be fun when no one’s trying to kill you. What would you say?”

“Work comes first,” he said, “but I’ll see what I can do. We can’t all afford to take reduced hours on full time pay.”

“Funny, I wasn’t aware you were paying me anything.”

“That’s not true. We set aside a sum under your life insurance. Of course, that money is for your family, but it covers every eventuality.”

For a moment, Light blanched. “You’re lying.”

“I wouldn’t lie about something like that,” L said around another mouthful of gummi bears. “If you want, Watari can show you – it’s under the folder marked ‘Compensation’.”

“Or,” Soichiro said, shuffling the documents in his hands, “if you want, you could move in with Miss Amane. You’re eighteen years old, and your mother and sister believe we had a disagreement about your relationship with her, so it wouldn’t be unexpected. I… spared the details.”

Light looked to L, to the expression on his face. It was entirely too interested. “I couldn’t do that,” Light said. “I know I’ve said it before, but I was only pretending to go along with Misa’s delusion for the sake of Ryuuzaki’s investigation. Her feelings towards me are completely one-sided, but he suggested I get close to her anyway. Now that the suspicions have been dropped, there’s no point to continuing that charade. It would be cruel.”

“Ouch, Light,” Matsuda said. “I’m glad she’s not around to hear that.”

“Matsuda’s right,” L said, with a tone of ‘for once’, “that’s a little cold.” The others were too busy looking at Light to notice the smirk on the detective’s face.

“Those were your orders,” Light said. From the corner of his eye, he spotted the shinigami Rem floating in through an inner wall. Although everyone in the room could see her, acknowledging it didn’t exactly make them feel at ease with the situation. “Continuing any sort of relationship with her would be wrong because, to be honest, she’s a stalker.”

Within moments, the mood of the room had shifted. “What?” Matsuda stood up from the sofa. “Misa-Misa wouldn’t do that.”

Aizawa rolled his eyes. “So a pretty girl throws herself at you. That doesn’t make her a stalker.”

L considered it. “That’s why she claimed to fall in love with you the day she saw you in Aoyama. Stalkers develop intense feelings for their victims extremely fast. If that’s the case, why didn’t you call the police?”

Light exhaled. “When we first met, it was because she followed me home. I thought she was just a lost Goth Lolita until she threatened my life on the porch step, so I invited her in and told my mother and sister that she was my girlfriend. I didn’t want them to worry or feel unsafe, and Misa seemed appeased when I played along.” He paused, taking in the concern on his father’s face, wondering just for a moment if he was actually concerned or doubtful. “I thought if I kept up the act until she left again, I could phone the police later and, if necessary, keep calling whenever she came back. I didn’t know until she was in my room that she knew who my father was, or that she had anything to do with those _occult tapes_ , and by then she was insisting on making me her boyfriend, demanding constant contact, threatening to kill any girl she saw me with…” he shuddered, appropriately. “Naturally, I feared she might be the type to turn on my _sister_ , so I complied and got her to go home again. I thought I could wait until the morning to file for a restraining order…”

L picked a few gummi bears out of the bowl. “Which was when you found out she was an up-and-coming idol, correct?”

“Right. And whether she was physically capable of committing murder, I realised she didn’t have to. Idols like her aren’t allowed to publically have boyfriends, and if I upset her, all she would have to do is hold a conference, tell a few lies about a boyfriend and drop his _distinctive_ name to the press. It wouldn’t matter to a girl like her if it ruined her career, because even if I survived the media storm, the NPA would find it in a background check. I’d be lucky if I got away with moving to Sapporo, changing my name and joining a tech company.”

“That’s specific,” Aizawa muttered.

“So,” Light said. “I asked my mother and sister to keep her a secret from Dad, even though her involvement in the tapes could have been a lead to the real Kira. She knew I was interested in the Kira case, and if it was a lie, the last thing I wanted to do was mislead you. I would have broken up with her, probably received a few odd parcels in the mail and requested a restraining order, but she had to find me at school and mislead the whole case as a result.” He focused his gaze just above L’s right ear, where he watched as Rem fixed him with her yellow eye, listening almost unseen.

“Light,” his father said. “Why didn’t you say anything about this before? We could have taken measures, moved house.”

“And disrupt everything for Mom and Sayu? Besides, it would have only sounded like a convenient excuse to Ryuuzaki. He doesn’t need to investigate his way out of a paper bag – he’d assign blame until it ripped itself.”

“But Light, I thought I taught you what to do in situations like these. I thought I told you to tell me if a stranger followed you home.”

Light sighed, meeting his father’s eyes. “You were already falling ill over the case. You were already stressed because of all of L’s suspects, I alone fit both Kira’s profile and his movements. If I was Ryuuzaki, and I knew my prime suspect had been spontaneously contacted by a dangerous individual who fit the Second Kira’s profile, I wouldn’t have waited on a cover story or for my prime suspect to confess; I would have brought them in for questioning immediately.”

When he looked back at the detective, he was stuffing a dainty handful of gummi bears in his mouth. He stared at him chewing. “I agree,” L finally said. “Light-kun’s involvement with Miss Amane was the piece that was always the most suspicious. If Light-kun were Kira,” if L noticed the way Soichiro stiffened, he ignored it completely, “and he decided to find an assistant, he would have also known he was being followed from class to class. He would also know that, thanks to the sheer number of young women he was seen with, his signature ‘type’ had been noted and the least suspicious option would be to choose a woman who fit the type. Maybe what they say is true about the rules of attraction being unfathomable, and maybe it’s not unusual for an attractive man like Light-kun to simply date an attractive woman like Miss Amane, but…”

“But what, Ryuuzaki?” Light asked. He picked a couple of gummi bears from the bowl; not to eat, just to let them sit in his closed hand.

“But, Light-kun,” he pushed the bowl slightly closer to himself, “there wasn’t any chemistry, was there?”

“Absolutely none.”

“If Light-kun were Kira, he would never allow himself to be saddled with such a dangerous woman, not unless the pros of keeping her around outweighed the cons and, if you don’t mind me asking, you weren’t interested in intercourse with her, were you?”

“Not even given the circumstances,” Light said. “She would be much happier with someone else.”

“As I thought,” L said. “I’m glad you could be honest with me.”

Light set the gummi bears back on the desk and wiped his hand on a tissue from a box by his computer. L’s sweet tooth had its risks, which tended to triple when handcuffs were involved. “Thank you,” he said, “but tell me – if I was still under suspicion of being Kira, would confessing this have confirmed your suspicions, or contradicted them?”

The glass bowl was still half full, but L smiled and picked up the discarded candy. Light hid his revulsion under his current expression – concerned conviction – as L proceeded to eat them. Light’s face felt warmer at the sight, waiting. “I might have reconsidered allowing her association with you to continue,” the detective said. “But it would have been a pity to lose such a lifeline.”

_So it didn’t matter after all._

“If that’s how you feel,” his father said, “then you shouldn’t continue to let her think she’s dating you. You should break up with her soon, as quickly – and gently – as possible.”

“I don’t think that’s an option,” L said. “Anything too subtle and she could convince herself it never happened.” He swivelled the chair round to find Watari wheeling in a large white cake with a pile of marzipan strawberries arranged on top. He just caught the panicked expression beginning to cloud the shinigami’s eye, willing her not to act. “If I were Light-kun, I would rip the plaster off immediately.”

“That’ll work!” Aizawa scoffed, _“‘I’m breaking up with you, Misa. I just need some space from you – a hundred square feet of it, to be exact, and if I never see your face again, it couldn’t be too soon.’_ ” He huffed again. “The Chief would fit what’s left of him in a matchbox.”

Matsuda sighed. He’d looked so uncomfortable hearing all this talk about Misa, but he knew where his loyalties lay. “Sorry, Light. At least you’ll save money.  Or, you won’t, you’ll be dead, but that won’t be so bad.”

“Don’t be an idiot,” Aizawa said. “This isn’t what he had in mind when he said he was willing to give his life for the case. It isn’t noble – it’s pathetic.”

“Both of you,” his father admonished, “think about what you’re saying.”

“I’m just saying,” Matsuda said, “there’s no Misa-Misa in the afterlife, right?”

Light sighed. He already knew what was in ‘the afterlife’, and by the look on Rem’s face, he was going to have it confirmed sooner than he had in mind.


End file.
